The failed friend: Can they be trusted as a work reference?
The failed friend: Can they be trusted as a work reference?
Why I’ll never agree with Molly’s side of the ‘Insecure’ recommendation debate
Writer’s note: This post was originally published on Medium’s “We Need to Talk” on May 10, 2020.
While scowling at the screen last Sunday, I listened to Molly give Issa excuse-after-excuse about why she wouldn’t help her “best friend” Issa with a block party plug. Fans of “Insecure” know this bathroom scene already. They’ve watched the HBO show and have debated endlessly about the status of the ladies’ friendship, not getting boyfriends involved in business and Issa’s career woes. While all of those points are valid, I just kept thinking one thing.
I tweeted, “I’m not about to put somebody’s passion project at risk because we’re on funky terms. I was a work reference for somebody I don’t mess with at all, and I still gave him a GLOWING review. He got the job too. Don’t mess up people’s $$$ b/c you’re having petty disputes.”
Separating your personal life from professional success
It is very rare that I will ever turn down a hard-working co-worker as a reference. We don’t have to be friends. I don’t have to want to hang out with you. But if I genuinely feel that you would do a good job with [insert company here], I’m vouching for you. If I see an opportunity for a new job or client, your name will come up. I’m the (un)paid publicist for my entire social circle. In fact, the person who I was referring to in the tweet above was accepted into two major organizations — one educational and the other professional.