Weird Barbie won me over in the 'Barbie' movie
Weird Barbie won me over in the 'Barbie' movie
Childhood memories and mother-daughter arguments came flashing back while watching my childhood hobby
For prior birthdays, I bowled, skated, had sleepovers and movie nights, and ate plenty of pizza and ice cream. I celebrated with the Girl Scouts and hung out with family. But when I turned 11 years old, I had bigger plans. I wanted all of these Barbie dolls and everything Mattel-related out of my room. I was tired of these Barbie dolls taking up space. The mansion; the three cars; the fold-up suitcase camper; the camp van; and all the residents (23 Barbie dolls, six Kens, one Skipper, pet dog) were in my way. It was an innocent wish that I thought would cost no one any money and be an enjoyable cleaning day. That is, until I realized my mother was none too thrilled about my decision.
For some odd reason, me wanting all these Barbie dolls out of my room sent her into a tirade, demanding to know who put me up to this and why I thought I was too old to play with Barbie dolls. She grumpily complained about how there was no place in the attic for all this stuff. I dared to suggest putting it all in the nearest trash can if it couldn’t be donated, but the glare on her face let me know this was not the best response. My older brother shrugged and started boxing things up while my mother switched between grumbling about Christmas gifts (my birthday is 11/11 so I’m guessing she would have to reevaluate her early-bought Barbie gifts) to not talking to me altogether.
I raised an eyebrow at this overly dramatic response and wondered how would she adjust to me really growing up and going away to college. (Fun fact: She did the same thing and argued with me all summer. She did not want me to go to an out-of-state school and wondered who was making me leave Chicago. Poor lady. She’s great now while I’m paying a mortgage and haven’t lived in my childhood home for 19 years, but she definitely wasn’t prepared for a little girl with an old soul.)
Although she was grumpy, she did appease me by getting rid of my Barbie stuff — minus one thing. She refused to box up the actual dolls. Instead, this short, fussy woman got a step stool and created two shelves on top of my bedroom windows, where all the Barbie dolls and Ken dolls were neatly lined up. Although I scowled at the idea of seeing them greeting me every time I looked toward the ceiling, I knew my mother wasn’t budging on this one. Plus, attics are dirty, smelly and dusty anyway. I backed down from a second argument.
So when she emailed me yesterday to ask if I knew about Louvenia “Kitty” Black Perkins, the creator of the first Black Barbie doll, I remembered how frustrated she was at her growing preteen child. We briefly talked about the “Barbie” movie, which I told her I had no interest in seeing. I hadn’t been into Barbie dolls for three decades, so why would I want to see a movie about this childhood toy? But somehow that one article about Kitty piqued my interest. It turns out I was wrong. The “Barbie” movie was surprisingly more entertaining than I expected it to be.
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What happened to these weirdo Barbie dolls? (Mild spoilers below)
First and foremost, although I outgrew Barbie, I 100% related to former FLOTUS Michelle Obama in her book “Becoming” when she admitted she didn’t want people playing with her dolls. I had way too many relatives and associates who treated all dolls (Barbie dolls, Cabbage Patch Kids, Jingle Baby, etc.) like science experiments. While I planned out daily outfits for them and dusted off the mansion floors, they would’ve liked to have made every single doll I owned into Weird Barbie. So I hid my dolls — all of them — whenever guests came over. Let them play with my brother’s G.I. Joe figurines. Go hang out with Wolverine. Get your fuggin’ hands off my Barbies!
For the first 11 years of my life, I probably was Gloria (played by America Ferrera) with endless enthusiasm about the pink world of Barbieland. Going into my preteen years, I wasn’t standing on a feminism soapbox the way Gloria’s daughter Sasha (played by Ariana Greenblatt) was though. I’d just moved on to crushing over Immature (later named IMX) and was more interested in boys who looked like black and white Ken dolls. I’d basically lost interest in girl stuff and upped the ante on boy craziness.
Recommended Read: “Boy craziness taught me to swim ~ The accidental way I learned how to conquer the deep end”
So parts of the “Barbie” movie were educational for me. I slept straight through the ridiculousness that was:
Video Girl Barbie (who the FBI had their eyes on for child pornography evidence)
Growing Up Skipper (who I wished my bra-stealing godsister would have owned)
Palm Beach Sugar Daddy Ken (who I would have enjoyed solely for the dog after my cynophobia wore off)
Alan and Midge (who I don’t remember being sold separately but definitely remember considering the wedding party collection)
Earring Magic Ken doll (who apparently came out in 1993 a year after I was over the Barbie world)
I was entertained, counting off all the cars, houses, kitchen and office decor I owned. This is the kind of movie that Barbie lovers need to see on a big screen to examine the backgrounds and count off all the toys you had or always wanted. I didn’t care about the perception of “perfect” Barbie. As a young, black girl, I already had a different view on being brown-skinned and pretty, so “stereotypical” Barbie didn’t phase me. Additionally, my mother was constantly finding the black version of every doll that was released so my Barbie collection looked like a shorter version of me anyway (with fluctuating weight).
Even when our home was burglarized as a kid, the criminals ignored all of my Barbie dolls — although they’d be valuable collectibles now. Interestingly, what actually destroyed a considerable amount of my dolls was neither bad ass kids nor bad ass burglars. It was squirrels! A pregnant squirrel had her babies, and those rodents chewed out the eyes, arms and other parts of most of my childhood toys that were in the attic. Oddly, those shelves my mother was determined to build above my bedroom windows saved Barbie and Ken from squirrel attacks.
I think after all these years of having no interest in Barbie, watching the movie brought back the happy feelings of just enjoying the imaginary world that I put the doll series in. In fact, when I was walking my dog a few weeks back, I was surprisingly sad to see someone’s Barbie townhouse sitting next to a trash can. As hypocritical as it sounds, I wondered why someone would just throw away a perfectly good-looking Barbie accessory. Why not give it away? Why trash it? I was my mother! I thought about that townhouse for the rest of the day and hoped someone scooped it on Craigslist. I became Sasha who started understanding where Gloria (or my mother) were coming from.
Watching this movie is making me a little happier than I expected it to. Was the Ken fight scene painfully stupid? Absolutely. Go get popcorn or take a bathroom break through that entire four-minute scene, and don’t return until it’s over. While the ending was unnecessarily deep, I was pleasantly surprised to find out more about th founder — and smiled at the joke in the very last scene.
I don’t miss the dolls nor have I ever regretted my 11th birthday wish. Still, it was fun going down memory lane to relive my childhood days and what I missed out on in Barbieland. To Ruth Marianna Handler, Black Perkins and my mother, I say “thank you.”
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