Is outing a cheater on social media worth it?
Is outing a cheater on social media worth it?
“Love Is Blind”: Why are these TikTok girls getting 15 minutes of fame off S.K.?
In our quartet of friends, two of us were clearly closer than the other two. (If you’re a fan of “Living Single,” “Girlfriends” or HBO’s “Insecure,” that was the four of us. In that friendship dynamic, I would’ve been Khadijah, Joan or Molly.) I was fairly close with two of the three but still very cordial with the third girl. When my closest friend of the crew (Ms. Bestie) introduced one of her platonic friends to Ms. Cordial, those two hit it off. Instantly, Ms. Cordial was a smitten kitten over this guy. I can’t recall how or why I ended up on a three-way call with Ms. Bestie and the guy, but the three of us would occasionally chat too.
Somewhere along the line, he saw a photograph of me in her photo albums and made a flirtatious comment. I raised an eyebrow while on the phone and ignored it, hoping it was a one-off. Then he did it a second time.
“You can cut that shit out now,” I said, firmly.
He paused and laughed. “I was just playing.”
We switched to a new subject and life went on. But about one week later, Friend #4 (who had no ties to the relationship and was not Ms. Bestie or Ms. Cordial) called me up to tell me I was dead wrong.
“Excuse me?” I asked, genuinely confused.
She went on to tell me that Ms. Bestie called Ms. Cordial and admitted that the boyfriend flirted with me via phone. I shrugged. It wasn’t that deep to me. He may have been kidding. He may have not been kidding. I let him know immediately to knock it off, and he did. Plus, she liked this guy so much that I wasn’t willing to get in the way of that unless something major happened. For me to snitch, it would’ve had to have been an unprovoked kiss, a touch, etc.
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But Friend #4 laid this guilt trip on me, saying I wasn’t a very good friend for not telling her this. We agreed to disagree. And Ms. Cordial went right back to dating that guy as if it never happened. This is one of many reasons I’m not big on outing people. When you do so, be prepared to be the reason they break up — or consider you an “op” for putting them at risk of a breakup.
Why is outing people on social media so accepted?
(Writer’s note: If you have not watched Season 3 of Netflix’s “Love Is Blind: After the Altar” and plan to, please don’t read any further.)